Not Him
by melissaaax3
Summary: When Sam imprinted Paul felt real fear for the first time since his mother died. They were told it was rare, but if that was the case he wouldn't be in this situation. Dark Paul, dark imprint. Paul/Bella Mature readers please.
1. Chapter 1

A.N: So I randomly had a dream and decided to write this. I have never done drugs nor do I condone the use of them. Mature readers please due to language, violence, substance abuse, and lemons. **Is a one shot but I guess if it became a popular demand thing I could turn it into a multi-chap. Please R&R. Thanks, - -melissaaax3**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT, ITS PLOT, OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS.**

Not Him

Paul fucked and fought. There was no deep undercurrent of emotions or distress that motivated his behaviour. Sure he had a shitty lot in life, but he became the way he was for purely selfish reasons. Anger was his driving emotion as a child but somehow he had grown to fuel his overwhelming anger on another emotion, pain. As mentioned before, Paul is a selfish creature to the very core. Others likened him to a rotten apple, rotted to the stem and Paul accepted this analogy taking it to heart. Selfish as he was, he did not thrive on his own pain. No reckless stunts, hurting himself, or attempts of suicide, but hurting others he relished. Around age 13, when he finally realized how tired he was of the anger pumping through his veins, tired of having his blood heated like lava always simmering from his rage. He was tired of having every breath and every action taken in anger. He found it ironically heated once again when he phased that first day; nevertheless, he realized something had to change. It wasn't a quick or easy transition. But Paul accepted that, he knew he would have to fundamentally build himself back up from the start.

The first time he actually noticed someone else's pain he got a feeling of power and satisfaction. He had said something nasty to a girl at school, there was always one girl or another. Each and every one romanticising his behaviour and wanting to "save him" from himself. What a load of shit. His usual method to ignore them and stomp away didn't seem to be working. So when he turned around to face the girl her expression was one of shock and hope. When he opened his mouth and showed her just how rotted he was verbally that expression crumbled and there was pain. That hurt, that beautiful look that he came to love, or as close to love as he was capable of. As a result Paul became very good at noticing the pain of others, knowing what to look for, because he was always looking. His game improved as well, his method of causing pain growing from needlessly rude insults and scathing statements into well thought out plans and mind games.

One of these plans lead him to losing his virginity, he had accepted a girl who asked him out at school. Told her he loved her, as if he knew what it meant and taken her virginity easily. He did not care to tell her it was his first time and let her believe what she wanted. That same day he had went and fucked another girl in his bed. He had arranged for his girlfriend to come over and his plan went spectacularly. Just as object number two cried his name loudly, clenching around him and he pulled out spilling on the sheets.

He turned at a pained gasp and her face is forever treasured in his memory, the look of absolute heart break. In fact Paul was almost sad when she fled his house a trail of tears in her wake, because he could no longer see her crumpled expression. He had then turned to girl number two and stated "Do you think she'll still let me fuck her, you're a shitty lay". He had been slapped but it was worth it. That is how Paul built up his reputation ad found messing with girls and often enough their boyfriends or even husbands, to be his new favorite game.

So when he joined the pack after a fight with some chicks boy friend, just how fucked up he was stopped being a secret. Paul loathed the pack mind, but he liked being a wolf, he liked the growth spurt, the strength, and even the anger. Jared was the next to join the pack, Paul's long time childhood friend and the closest thing he had to one now. The two reconnected and Paul was still the same heartless asshole, but Jared learned to ignore it. Sam had trouble at first, as Paul liked to bait him, not liking the older male simply because he was alpha. He baited him often, saying things about Leah and after an explosive fight between the two Jared talked to Sam. It was that same night that Sam imprinted on Emily and Paul first felt fear.

Imprinting scared him on a fundamental level, he knew how much Sam loved Leah, he had seen his pain. Pain doesn't lie, he seen how much pain Sam went through not being able to see Leah and then imprinting on and avoiding Emily. To be in Sam's head after the imprint made him phase back and physically get sick. Bent over naked as he was in the forest, with puke still on his face and the acrid taste of it in his mouth is how Jared found him. He threw him a pair of shorts and they sat there together. Both felt the same about imprinting Jared to a lesser degree then Paul. They feared how completely it changed Sam, every single free thought about or related to Emily. They felt a lesser degree of the pull threw him and when Sam finally accepted the imprint and left Leah heartbroken Paul took no pleasure from her pain. Paul and Jared grew closer and Sam even began to befriend the outcast, Emily having calmed him down a lot.

When the accident happened he did not feel joy at Emily's pain, physical pain had never brought him pleasure, he never wanted to be his father. Nor did he feel good about Sam's emotional pain, he felt his Alpha's pain through the pack and as a result he started to watch out for Emily. Not exactly being friendly to her, but no longer being his usual rude self. He was selfish and did not like his own pain.

After the elders finally explained what they knew of imprinting Jared and Paul both settled down, imprinting is rare and had only happened to two members of the pack before the one of their grandfathers.

When Jared imprinted Paul destroyed a forest. Jared had no qualms about accepting Kim and had even phased with Paul to try and explain it to him. Paul had been able to calm down and listen but he still hated imprinting and he feared it even more.

The pack grew as the threat of leeches persisted and Paul lived his day fucking with his brothers occasionally and returning to his normal schedule of fuck, dump, and fight. But in the back of his mind, imprinting loomed like an impending doom. When baby alpha finally joined the pack, Paul found his favorite wolf to pick on finding the happy go lucky nature of the other wolf annoying. The two were the most opposite in the pack and tended to rub each other the wrong way. Needless to say, they were not put on patrol together. When they were forced to be phased together Jake's mind was filled with Bella, if Paul could not tell the difference he almost would have thought baby alpha imprinted. Paul detested leeches and as a result he didn't have very nice opinion of the leech lover as he liked to call her.

Shit started to hit the fan when Sam had to alpha order Jake to not tell the leech lover anything and then when they saved her from the dreaded vamp. Paul's dislike for her grew, calmly talking to a vampire no fear to be seen on her face, but he could hear it in the furious racing of her heart and smell it in her blood. He didn't like that he couldn't pinpoint her fear it frustrated him and that made him even more frustrated.

How baby alpha found a way around the gag order he didn't know, but she was here and he was pissed. She was too, he could hear it, but he couldn't see it. He became incensed.

"What did you do to him?" She shouted, her eyes locked onto Sam.

Before he could answer Paul did. "We didn't do anything! What did he tell you?!" he shouted back, glaring murderously at the pale slip of a girl in front of him.

Her heart rate picked up and he could tell it was from anger and not fear by smell. A small growl escaped him just as she whipped her head in his direction. "He doesn't tell me anything because he's scared of you!" she answered hotly, Paul noticed the light shade of red dusting her cheeks in anger and felt his spine tingle.

He let out a loud chuckle surprising both Jared and Sam. Paul never laughed not even bitterly as he was now.

The little leech lover didn't seem to appreciate his condescending laugh. She charged him like a little hellcat, hauled off and slapped him.

Paul's humor stopped and he began to shake. His furious dark eyes locked onto her molten chocolate and the world melted away. Her eyes were the richest color of brown he had ever seen, with hints of light brown, dark brown and gold blending to make the most perfect color. They were framed by gorgeous long lashes and there was the cutest little birth mark next to the corner of her left eye. He noticed all of this in just seconds without tearing his gaze away from her eyes. Then time caught up to him. He could distantly feel Sam and Jared's apprehension as to why he suddenly stopped shaking. Paul had never been able to stop a phase so they were caught off guard.

He imprinted, on the fucking leech lover. If that didn't piss him off enough, the stab of pain he felt at referring to her as such did it and he phased immediately. Luckily enough or not lucky enough, his mind hissed at him, she was far enough away that he didn't catch her in his phase. It seemed she had moved back while he wasn't paying attention, this pissed him off and he got even more mad.

Then he heard baby alpha. He called for her and for the first time he seen her fear, but it wasn't for herself it was for him and he growled. Baby alpha ran towards her and Paul's wolf snarled and beat at his control "Mine!" it snarled with ferocity as she ran to Jake and he to her.

Jake noticed how pissed Paul was and leaped over Bella phasing mid air. Paul was distantly impressed before anger took over. They met in a tangle of limbs the silver of his fur clashing with the rust colored fur over his brother. Their tussle rolled them into the woods and he could distantly hear Sam sigh, order Jared to take Bella to Emily's (which he did not like), remove his clothing as he ran towards them and phase in.

They were ordered to stop and could do nothing but obey. His wolf grew uneasy as he heard the sputtering of Bella's truck in the distance. He shifted his wolf body in the direction before he even noticed and Sam was quick to realize what happened. He ordered Jacob to phase out right away and they were left a lone.

'Paul' he started hesitatingly through the mind link.

Paul snarled in reply before Sam sighed.

'Did you imprint on Bella swan?' asked the alpha wearily.

Paul said nothing but there was no need to when the mention of her name was all it took to play the whole scene in his head once more.

Sam was silent for a long moment before he sighed once more. 'Come on lets go' he stated, before phasing back.

Paul followed suit and they walked slowly to Sam's house. Finally Paul couldn't take the curiosity anymore. "Why didn't you say anything?" he asked moodily.

Sam finally looked over at Paul. "I know you. You are my brother and should I try to convince you of this you will fight me. You have to learn your lesson the hard way just as I did" he answered simply, giving Paul a measuring look. "It is your choice to deal with this how you see fit" he added, before looking towards the road once more.

Maybe it was the emotional day or the pure frustration he was feeling at the moment "I'm gunna' get drunk and get laid" he stated angrily, drawing Sam's hard stare once more.

The stare didn't last long and they got to Sam's house shortly with not another word spoken.

Upon entering his eyes went to her. She was seated in a chair in Emily's kitchen with a huge blueberry muffin in her hand, looking right at home. His wolf loved it, he hated it.

Now that his eyes were free from her captivating stare he used her obliviousness to his presence to scan her thoroughly. Her waist length brown hair shone with hints of red where the light hit it, a strand was tucked delicately behind her tiny ear and the graceful curve of her neck bared to him. Her skin was so pale, unmarked and snowy like a porcelain doll. She was wearing a long sleeved shirt, the dark green color contrasting her skin in an aesthetically pleasing way. The shirt clung to her tiny frame, her small breasts jutted out and her flat stomach defined. A sliver of that enticing skin was revealed between her shirt and the start of her dark jeans. The skin on the small of her back, just visible through the chairs wooden barred back. Her jeans, a blue so dark it almost bordered black, hugged her surprisingly wide hips the flare of them like an hour glass shape from the small part of her waist. He moved on to the next visible part of her, those dark jeans stretched over sinful legs and petite sock covered feet. He drank her in as his eyes met Sam's over the top of her head where he had immediately gone to Emily upon entering.

Sam's stare was unreadable to him, but he liked to imagine there was humor in there at his expense. He knew the other wolf could smell his desire, he could smell his own lust and his heartbeat sounded like the loudest thing in the room. Jared and Jacob were nowhere to be seen.

She lifted the muffin, the huge thing dwarfing her little hands and his mind immediately went to how small those hands would look wrapped around him. How her pale skin would look so nice stretched out against him, copper and white. Then she took a tiny bite, the flash of her tongue quick and perfect little white teeth in a straight line. She chewed and swallowed then her pink tongue darted out to lick her lip and he had to suppress his moan. A subtle cough chuckle broke him out of his lusting and he knew Sam was amused the older wolf had his face buried in Emily's neck as almost unnoticeable laughs shook his huge body.

Anger coursed through him and he welcomed it. He walked by Bella purposefully, snagged a muffin and headed out the back door without a look back.

He went home, popped open a beer and it was a blur from there. A couple weeks passed without him seeing Bella and avoiding pack gatherings. Sam didn't say a single thing about it and things continued on normally. Well normal accept for the tightening of his chest, the fact that he ran patrol with Sam only and avoided being phased with the others to keep his secret. The pain increased as the days went on and Paul spent most of his monthly stipend getting drunk. The end of the third week approached and he went to a party on the rez. Some kid had shrooms and Paul decided to see how many he could take before it fucked him up.

He woke up in the woods delirious. He struggled to his feet catching himself and wondering why Jared or Sam hadn't come to look for him or found him passed out. They should be patrolling and he'd be hard to miss. He heard a noise and rolled his neck over to look. A pain bloomed in his neck and he groaned, turning and throwing up in the dirt. He heard a noise again and anxiously scanned the trees. Hoping a vampire hadn't found him. There was a loud noise and a flash of light and he threw himself to the ground, barely avoiding rolling in his own vomit. He struggled to his feet after the flash his head pounding and ears hurting.

The first thing he noticed was a large stork like bird. The thing was huge and he fell flat on his ass at the sight of the seven foot tall bird sitting calmly in a tree. "What the fuck?" he whispered feeling frightened and confused.

The bird looked at him calmly.

Paul struggled to his feet once more trying to will his body into cooperation. He kept shooting frantic looks at the bird as he inwardly cursed his traitorous body. "What the fuck" he repeated in a mantra of confused delirium.

The bird laughed then and Paul's dilated eyes grew in size. "What causes the wolf to run from a mere bird like me?" it asked humorously, and Paul noted the distinctly male voice.

"Not real, not fucking real" he mumbled as he finally got to his feet, having trouble walking while not taking his eyes off the threat.

"How offensive, I assure you I am real. Don't you remember me?" the stork asked casually and Paul balked.

He vaguely remembered a field trip when he was 11, about the time that everything went to hell. It was just after really. After his dad finally beat his mom to her death in a drunken rage and he was left orphaned. The neighbours had called the cops at the noise, Paul had been saved but it was too late for her. He had been put up in Billy Black's house for a couple days and after a week he had returned to school and gotten a permanent place with an elderly couple on the rez.

The field trip was to the zoo and he remembered as the worker calmly explained the mating habits of storks. The fascination he felt about their strong mating urge, the courting process and hatching of the babies and then the departure. He had always thought I wish my dad had been like that stuck around to make me then fucked off after I was born.

The stork interrupted his process. "I must be going soon. Mating season approaches and I need to seclude myself away" it stated.

Paul tried to process the information. "You will not mate?" he asked in confusion.

The stork blinked. "Of course not, I don't desire that kind of thing. Family is nothing but a liability and a burden" it answered, surprising Paul once again. "I suppose in that way we are both alike, too afraid of pain to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. To keep safe and distant over anything else" it added and Paul's head spun.

He was talking to a stork, it was fucking ridiculous and terrifying for his drug induced mind and he didn't like what this hallucination was saying. Hallucination, yes because what else could it be but a figment of his very fucked up imagination? "You don't know me" he answered scathingly.

"But I do, I know you because we are the same. Both scared" it replied in a cold tone.

Paul let out an angry shout."You don't know me! I'm not scared, not weak" he yelled, pushing off the tree he was leaning against.

"Weak, yes always weak" the bird answered and Paul recognized the voice at once for what it was. He turned and met the image of his father. Fear coiling in his stomach in an instant primitive way. The man smirked coldly, so much like his own, and he fought not to throw up once more. "Not weak. I am not like you" he whispered.

The man laughed freely and Paul finally drudged up enough anger to put force behind his words. "I will never be like you" he repeated, his voice controlled.

The man eyed him. "You think you can be normal? Have a family maybe? You are heartless and scared. You will never know love. You don't want a family because you will hurt them just like me".

That was all Paul let the man say as he charged him angrily. He took down a tree and searched crazily for the man.

"Like me" he heard, followed by crazed laughter then a very bird like sound. He glanced up only to see the same stork flying away its bird like laughter mocking him.

Paul woke up in the woods, struggling to get up. He looked around the clearing and got sick. He was in the same clearing there was another pile of puke across from him, the smell being the cause of his sudden bout of sickness. A demolished tree stood to the side and he didn't know what to think. His head spun as he tried to decipher real from fake.

He groaned, pushing off the tree he had braced himself on when he threw up. He stumbled west, his hallucination urging him in that direction.

It took much longer then it should have for him to reach Forks, but as he stood under her window he felt a sense of calm that he had been missing since he imprinted. He struggled to climb the tree, making way too much noise and secretly glad the police cruiser was not in the driveway.

The noise woke her and the foolish girl stumbled to the window opening it without thought. He took in her sleep frazzled sate and absent mindedly wondered what time it was. Her hair was mussed in a wild way, her cheeks taking on a pink hue from the cold wind and he could visibly see the outline of her nipples through the men's shirt she wore.

He inwardly growled at the thought of her in another mans clothes but his drug induced mind was locked on to the visual stimuli of her bare legs prickled with goose bumps.

"Paul?" she asked hesitantly, confusion littering her sleep husky voice. She rubbed at one eye with a hand and he vaguely pondered on how she knew his name before figuring Jacob mentioned him.  
He simply stared at her and as she woke more from the cold he could sense how uncomfortable she was.

"A-are you okay?" it was asked quietly and he marvelled at the hidden worry in there.

He said nothing and she reached up to touch his head he tried to catch her wrist, sudden paranoia creeping up on him, but missed and flailed for hold on the tree.

Her hand was cool against his head and she sucked in a sharp breathe before hastily removing her hand."You have a really high fever. You're hotter than Jake" she said worriedly, biting her lip and eyeing his hulking form.

His drugged mind found that funny. "Of course I'm hotter then baby alpha I'm a man kitten" he answered, staring at her.

She frowned, confused before blushing. "You are really sick, I'm going to call Sam okay?" she replied, speaking to him in a gentle tone.

She turned and this time he managed to grab her wrist. The contact settles heavily with him. The physical reaction shocking him, he wondered if the drugs played a part or if it was simply the imprint. "No" he said resolutely.

She half faced him now and her face shone with concern. "What happened? You are sweating buckets and I'm really scared. Are you ok? I need Sam-"she ranted only to be cut off by a growl.

She tried to take a reflexive step back but he pulled her close. He braced himself for the rush of pleasure he got from touching her last time and it helped, but having the top half of her body flush against him with his hand curled around her wrist possessively was much more intense.

She gasped, nothing more then a quick intake of breath. "You don't need Sam. Don't say his name. All you need is me, you're mine" he explained, rubbing his nose down the graceful curve of her neck.

"I don't know what's going on Paul. But I'll stay with you okay. So let's call Sam please?" she pleaded, looking at him earnestly and worriedly.

He vaguely wondered just how much the imprint affected her. The mention of Sam had his wolf alert again. His teeth nipped her neck in reprimand and she yelped.

She was completely still in his arms. "Don't beg for him. You have me, I'm not weak" he muttered into her shoulder. He could smell her fear now. It did not please him.

"I won't hurt you" he whispered fiercely, remembering the stork and his father. "You are mine Bella, you are to me what Emily is to Sam. You are MY imprint. I can't stay away from you anymore", he added flashbacks in his head.

She took a deep breath. "What does that mean" she whispered, her voice tight with fear.

Not him. No never him. No fear. Please no fear. "I love you" he stated, it was a lie. It left a cold feeling in his stomach. The smell of fear went away and Paul was grateful, not him.

She met his eyes and his desire sky rocketed."What do you need?" she asked slowly, taking a deep breath.

"You" he answered and he knew this time it was the truth. His lips met hers then and nothing else mattered.

As she lay beneath him on her bed, her trusting eyes met his and it hurt. But he had to do this, he wasn't him. He had to. He gently removed her t-shirt, his eyes immediately going to her small breasts. She was blushing and the smell of her fear was there again as she attempted to cross her arms.

"I love you" he repeated, the lie tasting foul and she nodded, letting him pull her arms away. He kissed, licked and nipped her creamy breasts, feeling the hardness in his pants get painful. He sat up, struggling to pull his cut-offs off. She sat up too, so shy and embarrassed as she helped him. Her hands on his button had him hold his breath. He watched has her delicate, shaky little hands undid his button and unzipped his fly, moving to pull on the hem of his cut-offs. They came off easily, trapped around his thighs before he shifted kicking them off.

Her hands were on him then and it was so much better then he fantasized. He didn't let her touch much, it had been too long and she felt so good. He pinned her once more and kissed her passionately his large hand going to her small brown boy shorts and pulling. He ripped then easily and the smell of her desire increased.

The smell of her fear came back so he lied once more. He touched her gently, coaxing small moans from her throat. When they weren't enough he added his mouth, bringing her to pleasure and groaning at the taste of her in his mouth.

He met her again in a fierce kiss, this one possessive, as he lined their bodies up. The fear was very strong now. "I love you Bella" he whispered in her ear, as he finally joined them as one.

-'  
When he woke the next morning his head pounded, and his neck twisted painfully. The room was too bright and he rolled over. All that disorientation faded away when he was met with bare skin.

He sucked in a quick breath his skin breaking out in goose bumps as he perused porcelain skin, dread filling his churning stomach.

Her face was angelic. Long brown waves spread around her like a halo, the red more prominent then ever in the morning sun light. Her lips were slightly curled at the corners and her sweet breath brushed the top off his hair from where he looked up at her.

Like a bomb the night came back to him. He remembered the party, drinking, taking the shrooms and the hallucination. He remembered every word said to him, and coming to her. He remembered the quiet worry and the fear. He remembered the lies. He remembered "You think you can be normal? Have a family maybe?" and most of all he remembered when he spilled his seed inside Bella so purposefully, without protection.

He bolted from the bed.


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N: So everyone who reviewed so far has said that they'd like this to be turned into a multi-chap fic. Honestly I have no idea where I'm going to take this. I usually write out a plot skeleton for my multi-chap fics, but this one was based off a dream I had. I literally just got on the computer and started typing. It worked well last time, so that's how I'm going to continue. Thanks for all the reviews and encouragement. I'll try my best to continue this story in a way that you would all like.**

**Warning for a LOT of swearing, Paul has a dirty mouth!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANYTHING RELATED TO IT, JUST THIS PLOT.**

Not Him: Chapter Two

Paul was very lucky that no one was phased, because the second Bella's front door clicked shut he took off from the porch, phasing mid-leap. A distant part of his brain was really thankful that the police cruiser was still not there, that would have been a messy situation. He could see it now, "Lahote, why the fuck are you coming out of my front door naked as the day you were born?" accompanied by the cocking of a shotgun.

But the majority of his mind, fuck his whole self, was centered on the massive fuck up that just took place, thanks to his drug-induced delirium.

First and foremost, he fucked Bella Swan. How this changed the imprint, he could only begin to imagine. Already he could feel the unease of his wolf, as the imprinting chord's vibration got farther and farther away with the distance he put between himself and her home. He noted that he was referring to her as Bella instead of leech lover, also a new development, but that was as far as he got. Since he was still freaking out over discovery number two.

In fact he was so freaked out of this discovery, that it completely kept his mind off his memories of fucking said, ex-leech lover-ouch-turned wolf lover. Which was pretty sad, because that was the best fuck he ever had, in fact he had no idea how he was going to enjoy sex ever again. He imagined it was like sky-jumping out of a plane, then going back to cliff-jumping. The rush would be completely unsatisfactory, no comparison. Back to the subject though, the dreaded second discovery. His fucked up drugged-out mind, thought it wise to fuck Bella Swan without protection. He could see it being an accident, well he never had an accident before. Protection was the difference between life and death for Paul, with how much he played around he took STD's very seriously. Paul had never fucked anyone while that messed up before, in fact he never had been that messed up since he phased, another thing to worry about but, it honestly paled in comparison with his other problems. Needless to say, despite being fucked up Paul didn't use protection for a reason. That reason being, what his hallucination of _that man_ told him.

There is nothing more on this planet that Paul detested more then his father. In fact he would rather befriend a leech then ever make nice with his father, presuming the bastard ever showed his face near Paul again. Let's just say that there is no love lost between the two. Paul tries very hard not to be like the man whose sperm he came from, so the hallucination got him good. It seriously messed with his brain.

Paul never wanted kids; in fact he just doesn't do kids. He never had a childhood; he never really got to be a kid so he doesn't take well to any of the little critters. More important then that though, Paul doesn't like to be told he can't do something. Jared knows this, Sam knows this, Baby Alpha knows this, shit everyone in LaPush knows this. You don't tell Paul not to do something, because without a doubt, no matter what it is, he will do it. You see this is something Sam learned very quickly, and the main reason the two did not get along very well in the beginning.

So his hallucination of his father telling him not to do that, well that pissed him off. I mean Sam telling him he can't miss a meeting pissed him off, some guy saying he can't mess around with their girl pissed him off, and so this made him extremely pissed.

That's all good and well; Paul's fucked up and doesn't like people telling him what he can't do so he decides to cum inside Bella Swan. Just great he showed that hallucination, now what in the world is he going to do about this. Ughhhhhh.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -breakkkkkk

Its a few hours later that Paul finally manages to drag his naked human self to his house. He stays just long enough to pull on a pair of cut-offs and take off for Sam's. When he emerges from the woods, the sight of the little yellow house has his apprehension rising. No more like the thought of what's to come has him nervous as hell, and Paul doesn't do nervous well.

Taking a breath, he shoved open the front door, without knocking, which is the norm for Paul. Emily was, like usual busying around in the kitchen and Sam, who didn't have patrol today was watching football on T.V.

Sam looked up at his approach, cool gaze scanning Paul from head to toe.

Paul waited with baited breath, before realizing this and releasing his frustrations with a quiet growl.

"I assume this has to do with the reason you ditched patrol last night? Embry had to cover for you. You are very lucky he got mad and couldn't fight the phase otherwise no one would have noticed you weren't patrolling. This tribe can not be unprotected-" Sam started with his lecture, the familiar words soothing something in him, which was just aching for normalness in this messed up situation. He actually had to keep himself from laughing, something that would no doubt, not go over well with his alpha.

Zoning back in, in time to hear-"You're stuck on Friday and Saturday night shifts on top of your regular schedule until next month". He fought back his need to argue and instead released a harsh breath.

Sam, who noticed the lack of rebuttal and the unusual lack of fight at his punishment, scanned Paul once more. The only thing clean on the wolf were his cut-offs, making Sam assume he had changed. He was just glad Emily was so busy she hadn't noticed how dirty the other wolf was she would have surely gotten mad. He was distracted out of his musings by Paul, "Look, about that sorry. Can we talk?" His eyes snapped up to Paul's face and the slight widening of his eyes, was the only reveal of his shock at the apology. Paul just didn't do apologies and no one expected him to. Now on high alert, Sam nodded sharply and stood, leading the other wolf out the back door and into the woods.

When they finally stopped, Sam looked at Paul in a silent demand for him to start.

Paul sighed, "It'll be easier if I show you. Can you...make sure no one else is phased first?" he asked.

Sam stripped off his cut-offs, phasing immediately. Jacob was patrolling so he quickly told him to go home and he would finish the rest of his patrol. Nodding to Paul the second Jacob phased out; he waited for the other to join him.

As soon as he felt the ripple of Paul's phase in the pack mind, he was sucked into the other wolf's chaotic mind. All of Paul's memories and thoughts played out.

At the end of it the two sat in silence except for the whirling of their brains. Paul's still fretting about what he would do and Sam's reaction. Sam's mind was stunned into blankness.

Sam knew Paul wasn't holding up too well, being that he only phased with Sam to keep his imprint private from the others. Sam had first hand knowledge that he was dealing badly, but to think something like this would happen...only with Paul.

Fed up with Sam's slowly moving thoughts, Paul interrupted "Well?" he demanded, impatiently.

Sam sighed, feeling twice his age. "Well what?" he asked calmly.

Paul almost growled. "Well how about what the fuck do we do?" he snapped, glaring at the black wolf seated across from him.

Sam's muzzle lifted in a snarl at this. "Watch your tone! There is no we, I didn't impregnate Bella Swan, you did!" he replied, pissed beyond extreme at the other wolf's carelessness.

Paul growled back. "I know! So what do I do almighty Alpha?" he questioned sarcastically.

Sam clenched his jaw. He could hear the other's thoughts and knew Paul was just being a dick because he was freaking out. The other wolf seriously expected his alpha to be able to fix this. In a way Sam was touched but he was mostly annoyed. "Look Paul, I warned you about fighting the imprint and you didn't listen. I told you that you had to learn the hard way and this is part of that. After weeks of denying the imprint you literally go crazy. Trust me, I know. Your mind is singularly focused on anything but your imprint and your wolf doesn't like that at all. Our people have very strong beliefs in visions even using ceremonies to invoke visions of the future. Old Quil's mother, the witch doctor does this often for the council" he explained, feeling the other wolf's curiosity at where he was going with his explanation.

"After your vision when you woke up, why did you go to Bella?" Sam asked, watching the other wolf expectantly and tuning into his thought process.

"I don't fucking know! Maybe because I was tripping out" he answered.

Sam ignored Paul's moodiness. "After that vision you were freaking out. The reason you went to Bella is because of your wolf. He made you go" Sam stated, waiting for the expected outburst.

"What the fuck do you mean?" Paul snarled, ready to attack Sam if he didn't explain everything right this moment.

Once again ignoring the hostility of his subordinate, Sam sighed. "Ignoring the imprint puts you in a very fragile state of mind. Add on to that the drinking and the drugs, I think that is the reason you were so messed up. The stress on your body from ignoring the imprint slowed down your healing. When I was ignoring Emily, I had to fight off a leech. Before I killed it, it got me with its claws. When Harry and Billy found me I was passed out in the woods in human form. They took me to Old Quil. Old Quil didn't know what was happening, so he gathered an offering and went to the Witch Doctor. She told him this, 'The wolf heals the man, the man denies the wolf, and the wolf denies the man'. Basically saying, by denying Emily, my imprint, I was denying the wolf meaning my healing abilities were affected. You also denied your wolf and our abilities that burn off alcohols and drugs so quickly were affected. Simply put, your tolerance level was slightly above a regular human's" he lectured, pausing to take in Paul's reactions.

"That's fucked up! My wolf is pissed a me for ignoring some pussy so he fucked me over? Why not just stop me from phasing then?" Paul snarled, pissed beyond belief that his wolf played a part in causing the fucked up situation he now found himself in. "That still doesn't explain why the wolf made me go to Bella either, how the fuck did he do that?" he added, angry and confused.

"You're putting it simply, but yes the wolf is pissed at you. The imprint is part of the wolf package so denying the imprint is denying the wolf. I asked Billy about the phasing thing to because; to me at the time it was the solution to all my problems. If I no longer phased, I was no longer attracted to Emily and I could sill be with Leah" Sam answered, with the pain filled expression that always clouded his eyes when Leah was mentioned. "The way Old Quil explained it to us is this, the wolf can not deny the phase because once our genetics are triggered we can't go back, we can only go forward. He said the only way to stop the phase is when we have enough control to stop the anger and prevent the phase. Even then it takes many years before we lose the ability to phase. The wolf can not take that away because the phase is what the human does, the healing is what the wolf does. Do you understand?" he questioned seriously, regarding the other wolf who seemed to settle down a bit more.

Paul nodded sharply and Sam took that as a sign to continue. "As for the wolf making you go to Bella it works like this, the state you were in wasn't pretty and after the vision it was even worse. You were scared and protective on a baser instinctive level. Don't argue because I seen it, I experienced it with my own eyes. You were scared, I was scared and that's alright. There is no shame in being scared of someone who did that to you Paul" Sam started, raising his voice when it looked like Paul would object. He eventually switched back to his original explanation, glad he got the chance to tell Paul something he had been wanting to say ever since he found out his story via the pack mind. "Anyways, like I said you were in instinct mode and the instincts are, once again the wolf. The wolf took you to its mate to feel secure and to protect her from the threat you felt. That is how he got you to Bella, he took advantage of your basic emotions to push his instincts over you. This isn't necessarily a bad thing as your instincts calmed down immediately upon seeing Bella. The separation pain you carried for weeks vanished too, it was the most peaceful you've been in a long time" Sam explained.

Paul groaned, "Why do I feel like there is a 'but' in that?" he asked wearily.

Sam nodded. "You're right, there is. The 'but' in this case is this, I think that the wolf had something to do with the vision" he stated.

At this Paul flipped out spectacularly. "What the fuck! He can do that!?" he yelled, positive that if he wasn't already phased, this would have done it.

Sam smiled grimly. "Like I said this is just a deduction on my part. The wolf is a spiritual being and visions are spirit quests. The wolf is you and knows you better than any other even us. He knew you would not give into the imprint so he forced your hand. Now that you have slept with Bella you have accepted the imprint. Not only that, but if I'm right and he did cause the vision then his main goal was for you to impregnate Bella" he finished in a whisper, the mere mention of it making it all the more real.

Paul swallowed loudly. "It was only one time. She might not even get pregnant" he muttered weakly, spitting the last word out like it was a disease.

Sam's look darkened. "If that was the wolf's intention then he must have been positive it would work. That was his only chance to force your hand" he replied.

Paul shook his head in denial. "No fucking way. She could be on birth control a fucking wolf couldn't beat that. He's just a stupid animal there's no way he knows the difference" he said desperately.

Sam's eyes widened. "Paul this is very important. I need you to remember how Bella smelled when you slept with her" he demanded.

Paul's eyes narrowed and his wolf forced a growl out of him. Its hackles were raised another male wanted to smell its mate. Paul fought his wolf's instinct and resisted the urge to kill Sam. He took a deep breath and found the memory his alpha requested.

I was there, when she opened her window and the wind-that rose those delicious looking goose bumps on those gorgeous naked legs that he wanted wrapped around his waist while he-carried her scent over to him the usual strawberry and freesia scent magnified with a spicy hint to it. Just the memory of it had him and his wolf going crazy. He dropped to the ground on his belly, tucking his muzzle into the ground and whimpering, even his wolf body was hard. That had never happened before and fuck if it wasn't disturbing. His wolf was the one trying to make him phase. It wanted him to phase and go to their mate.

One word snapped him from his internal struggle, "Fuck!" and it came from Sam.

That simple word that he used like it was going out of style filled him with a dread so enormous he immediately focused on the distraught Sam. There was one thing everyone knew, you don't tell Paul not to do something and when Sam swears it's really bad, like Armageddon-Emily doesn't like that shit.

"Paul, Bella was ovulating and she was definitely not on birth control. You are going to be a daddy" Sam said in a shocked, dread filled voice. Their eyes met and Paul knew Sam was not fucking around.

All Paul could think in that moment was, 'I am never drinking or doing drugs again. What the fucking fuck!'.


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N: Sooooo. I just want to say thank you to all my reviewers who encouraged me to keep going. It really sucks when someone accuses you of plaigarizing when you put your heart and soul into your work. So thanks for showing your appreciation and enthusiasm for my story. With that said, voila please R&R.  
- -melissaaax3**  
**DISCLAIMER: DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT S.M. DOES.  
RATED M FOR LOTS OF SWEARING AND LEMONS; PAUL HAS A DIRTY MOUTH...AND MIND. :)**

Not Him: Chapter Three

_Last Time..._

_One word snapped him from his internal struggle, "Fuck!" and it came from Sam. _

_That simple word that he used like it was going out of style filled him with a dread so enormous he immediately focused on the distraught Sam. There was one thing everyone knew, you don't tell Paul not to do something and when Sam swears it's really bad, like Armageddon-Emily doesn't like that shit. _

_"Paul, Bella was ovulating and she was definitely not on birth control. You are going to be a daddy" Sam said in a shocked, dread filled voice. Their eyes met and Paul knew Sam was not fucking around. _

_All Paul could think in that moment was, 'I am never drinking or doing drugs again. What the fucking fuck!'._

After the enlightening conversation with Sam, Paul somehow managed to drag himself home. He didn't know how he did it and couldn't even begin to recall anything that was said after Sam's dreaded words, "You are going to be a daddy".

So now here he was, laying in bed and staring up at the cieling like it held all the answers to life. The ridiculousness of this situation had yet to disappear. Leaving him in a strange shocked, horror-filled state. He just couldn't wrap his mind around it and attempting to organize his thoughts proved fruitless.

It could have been hours or minutes, but he finally felt himself returning to the real world. He decided to take some deep breaths and clear his mind. He remembered learning that from T.V. one of those reality Dr. shows.

So where to begin? How about a list of what he knows and go from there. Okay, easy enough right? Fact 1: Denying the imprint caused his wolf to weaken his healing and recovery abilities. Fact 2: His wolf took advantage of his drunk/high to put him in a fucked of vision, with the intention to make Paul impregnate Bella Swan. Fact 3: Bella was ovulating, so she will pretty much be gaurenteed to get knocked up. Fact 4: He is stuck in an imprint that he had no intention of accepting with a pregnant imprint who doesn't know he intentionally knocked her up.

Now what to do about this whole mess? What could he do? Go to Bella and tell her everything? How he lied about loving her, didn't even want her, and was forced to accept her by his wolf? Oh and that he not-so-purposefully, intentionally knocked her up?

The girl didn't even know about the imprint til' last night and she probably didn't even know what imprinting was. She has no obligation to him at all, she has a choice. Unlike him, she can choose not to be with him. It's not hard to guess what her reaction would be.

Just lying to get someone in bed gaurantees a slap and an "I hate you, I never want to see you again"! Fighting a cringe at that thought, he sighed deeply.

He can't tell her. As soon as he does it's over; which is what he wanted in the first place. After fucking her and accepting the imprint, not what he wanted any longer. That's without adding that she's going to have his kid. So he really doesn't want her to flip out and leave him, taking his kid with him-even if he doesn't like kids. So that leaves him with not being able to tell her the truth for fear of her leaving him, when he never really had her in the first place.

Basically Fact 5: Do not tell Bella the truth. What can he tell her then, "Hey Bella, let's go out since you're my imprint?" and ignore everything else that happened?

Fuck, and how does he bring up the pregnancy thing? Like does he go see her and ask her to be his girlfriend; pretend he doesn't know she's pregnant? Then when she finds out play the good boy friend, happy-soon-to-be-dad part?

Or should he give her space and wait for her to come to him for help about the baby? Last night was fucked up. It was the best lay he ever had, but messed up none the less. Shit after their first screaming match, he never spoke to her and hasn't seen her since. Then he shows up at her house out of no where?

Just why the fuck did she even let him in? What a stupid broad. Did she let him in because it was him or does she let guys in her bedroom window all the time? Fuck if that thought didn't just piss him the hell off.

Trying to calm down and get back to his thoughts, he decided to ignore the 'or' part of that question. So she let him in...either she's stupid and has no sense of self-preservation or she feels the imprint and just wanted to be close to him.

She used to fuck a leech for fucks sake, so it's probably a little of both and that thought had him shaking. It was a few minutes before he was able to shake the urge to phase.

Honestly, Paul could barely understand his reasons for doing the fucked up shit he does; therefore, trying to figure her out was a waste of time.

Choices: either date the leech lover-wince-and play baby daddy or wait til' she comes running, baby in tow?

He groaned audibly. Honestly, he wasn't really confident in his abilities to be someone's boyfriend, let alone someone's daddy.

Paul never had a girlfriend, shit he's never even treated a girl nicely. Add to that his dad wasn't a good parent, let alone a decent human being.

Paul didn't really put much stock in lying or acting either. Lying is fine to get what you want, but not in the long-term. Lying to get in someone's pants then dump them, fine. Lying about being a loving boyfriend ect. for the rest of his life, not acceptable. He really had no desire to pretend to be someone else let alone change.

He doesn't want his relationship to be a lie, which is ironic since it will be built on them or omissions anyways.

Conclusion: Play it safe til' she comes to him, which she will. She's a high school senior. Sure she graduates in a month, but there's no way she's going to be able to take care of a baby on her own. Plus she's a nice girl and nice girls would tell their baby daddy that they have a baby because it's the right thing to do. They also think babies are all sparkles and rainbows, shit she'll probably be ecstatic. Girls love babies, Emily loves them; so really she should be thanking Paul for his wolf-sperm.

That's that then. She'll come see him, tell him she's pregnant and he will ride in to the rescue. She'll be so greatful for the help that she won't care about the rest.

Relaxing now that he reached some kind of conclusion in his head, he drifted off to sleep.  
- - - - - - - - -

Paul next woke up to a howl in his back yard. Struggling out of bed, he pulled on his discarded cut-offs from earlier and trugged out his back door.

He spotted Sam's wolf just by the tree-line before the black wolf dipped behind a bush. Sam emerged a minute later in human form.

"Hey" Paul muttered, tucking his hands in his jean pockets and shuffling awkwardly on his back porch.

Sam nodded in reply. "Okay no one else is phased right now. Let's run patrol and go over what you're going to do about Bella. I came up with a few ideas, but it's best we figure this out together" he ordered, turning and stepping back into the woods.

Paul sighed, stepping off his porch and dropping his shorts. He tied them to his ankle and phased, before following Sam's trail.

The two were silent as their minds caught up with one another.

Sam was the first to speak. 'Are you sure that's wise? Bella is your imprint do you really think she'll be fine with you sleeping with her then ignoring her for a few weeks?' he asked, confused at the other wolf's logic.

Paul sighed loudly, idly noting he probably broke a world record for # of sighs in one day. 'Sure she'll be pissy about it, but when she finds out about the baby she's going to want to talk. My guess is she'll go to you or Emily. You tell her where I live, we talk, that's the end of that' he explained.

Sam tried a different method of reasoning 'Paul I don't know about this plan. I really think you should just talk to her now and tell her everything, I mean _everything_. She's a good girl and she's your imprint she'll understand. I can help explain things to her if you need me to'.

Paul growled. 'You want me to tell her daddy hit me so I'm fucked up, please don't leave me cuz' I knocked you up and lied about loving you?' he snarled menacingly.

Sam growled right back. 'You think ignoring her and waiting for her to come to you will work? Your whole plan is based on assumptions. Then there's the imprint seperation pain and you're forgeting she doesn't have to choose you but, she is it for you. You need to grow up!' he shouted angrily before adding, 'Do you want to be alone? She can go find someone else. Find some nice, decent guy who treats her well and doesn't ignore her. Maybe she'll finally give in to Jacob. You want Jacob to be your baby's daddy?' he snarled, tempted to get in the other wolf's face.

Paul's anger just kept building the more Sam went on and at the last part he lost it, leaping at his alpha in a fit of rage.

Sam was ready for it though and deftly flung him off, getting back to his feet. 'Pisses you off, doesn't it? Then stop being a douchebag and use your brain. You want to ignore the problem and hope she decides to fix it? Fine, but you need to think about the consequences of your plan or what you're going to do if your plan doesn't work' he explained, feeling a little bad for pushing the younger man.

Paul's mind was a mess. His wolf was absolutely livid at Sam's suggestion that his mate choose another, let alone Jacob Black.

Sam waited for the feral wolf to calm down before continuing 'I agree you have a point about my plan. It doesn't matter how bad your childhood was and how nice of a girl Bella is. There is still a huge chance that she'll want nothing to do with you and you can't risk that'. He ignored Paul's whimper, adding 'Now you need to see how your plan has the same risk. Not only that but, say your plan does work. What do you want with Bella? Are you going to make her your girlfriend? Are you going to help her with the baby? If yes, then how are you going to help her with the baby? Are you going to let her live with you? Marry her? What do you plan to do if she comes to you for help? Paul, what can you do for her?'.

As Sam threw question after question at him, Paul began to feel smaller and smaller. He was really starting to feel in over his head and useless. He answered after a few minutes. 'I don't know the answer to any of those questions. Sam I'm not good at this stuff. I have no idea what a normal person would do in this situation' he reluctantly admitted.

Sam felt the other wolf's hopelessness and decided to help out. 'I don't consider myself normal what with the shape shifting and all, but do you want my honest advice? What I would do for Emily in this situation?' he asked seriously.

At Paul's nod, Sam continued 'I think you should talk to Bella. Go to Bella's house tomorrow, tell her about the imprint, and tell her you were fighting it because you didn't want to imprint. Make sure she knows it wasn't her you didn't want but imprinting in general. It's a really big commitment and you were scared. You stretched the imprint bond and it made you ill. Apologize for last night, ask her to be friends and get to know her. Taha Aki gave her to you for a reason, find out why'.

'Try and be her friend and I really mean it, don't just pretend. Gain her trust, when she finds out about the baby she will definitely talk to you about it. This is your chance Paul. I know it's not ideal, but you need to look at the advantages. You aren't the nicest guy and relationships are hard for you. The imprint ties you to her and this baby, this baby ties her to you. It's more assurance then you started out with. It's not much but, it's something and you need all the help you can get. She's pregnant with your kid. You can ask her to move in and marry you, having a baby is a good reason to say yes at her age. It's the right thing to do by Bella and the baby. Some couples can take time like Em and I: Date, have an engagement, marry, then have kids. Others are more fast pace, there's no right or wrong way to do things. Getting married, living with someone, and having a baby are life changes they don't mean you have to change yourself. As your imprint she is your match in every way. Have some faith that she will love you for you because she is what you need and you're what she needs' Sam explained, paying attention to Paul's thoughts as he lectured.

'As far as things go, you're not as bad off as you could be. You have your GED, your grandfather's house and the money he left you. You have your monthly stipend from the tribe and a place at my construction company if you need it. It's not perfect or planned but, you aren't in a bad position for a baby. I know this wasn't something you ever thought you could have, but now you have it all and you just need to take it. No one is born knowing how to be a boyfriend, a husband, or a father. You just try your best and learn as you go' Sam added, trying to point out the positive things.

There was a pause as he waited for Paul to collect his thoughts and answer.

'You make it sound almost easy' Paul stated and Sam could feel Paul's jealously of him.

'It will be the farthest thing from easy. You need to become Bella's friend then take a lot of big steps together' he retorted, then added 'You're only nineteen years old Paul and Bella just turned eighteen. You guys are still young, you can't expect to know how to expertly deal with everything' in response to Paul's thoughts.

Paul sighed tiredly. 'I'm not really good at being anyone's friend' he mumbled bitterly.

Sam laughed at that. 'No need to tell me' he deadpanned, before adding 'You have your own way of being a good friend. Just knowing you have my back against any leech and you'd be there for me if I needed you is enough for me to consider you one of my best friends'.

Paul's thoughts were tinged with gratitude. 'You too. I mean you're a good friend too' he replied awkwardly. 'Without you I'd fuck this all up even worse, so thanks a lot' he added making Sam smile.

'The council really should pay me for this shit, it wasn't in the job description' teased Sam, making Paul snort.

'So I think we've reached a conclusion. I'm going to call a meeting tomorrow to explain about your imprint on Bella. You spend the day with Bella. I'll set-up a bonfire for Friday. After you leave Bella's we'll all phase together. You can't avoid phasing with the others forever. I'll alpha order them to keep quiet about everything if I have too. This is a good lesson for the others if they imprint' Sam decided.

'Jacob is going to be pissed' Paul stated emotionlessly.

Sam let out a short laugh. 'I don't think he'll be the only one. What you did wasn't nice Paul, but it was your choice to make' he retorted.

Paul didn't answer, but his dejected feelings made Sam add 'Look I have your back and you known Jared understands you best. You only have to worry about Jacob and Embry, they'll get over it. Plus, when have you ever let what anyone else thinks about you bother you?'.

Paul nodded, feeling better.

Sam yawned 'Good. I'm going back to Emily, I'm dead on my feet. Jared's on patrol in a couple minutes, go home and get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow night' he ordered, ignoring Paul's chuckle at his wolf-yawn.

Paul turned towards his house and after a shower, dropped into bed like a rock.

For Bella, Jake ignoring her was like being doused in ice water. A very unpleasant, rude awakening. She spent such a long time wraped up in her own pain after Edward and the Cullens left her, that she really didn't realize how special his friendship had become to her.

She may have started using Jake to keep Charlie from sending her to Jacksonville, but it turned into her closest friendship. She started to look forward to seeing him and without noticing it she slowly started to smile and even laugh again. Then she started to eat better, sleep better, gain back the weight she lost, take better care of herself and her appearance.

After the disastorous movie night with Mike Newton, Bella was worried sick for her best friend.

In such a small amount of time Jake had become everything to her. So it hurt a lot to find out that instead of being sick in bed-like he had his father lie to her-he was running around La Push with Sam Uley and his same Sam Uley he hated and admitted to being afraid of. The same Same Uley who snatched up Embry and started to watch & follow Jake. So not only was Bella hurt, she was pissed.

Which lead to her driving her pissed little ass to Billy's with soup for Jacob, who she knew wasn't sick. That little-UGH! Anyways, after pushing past Billy-she would definitely hear about that from Charlie later, but couldn't force herself to care right now-after he predictably told her Jake was sick and no she could not come in.

And there he was-sleeping peacefully on his much too small, single bed. Long russet-skinned limbs, corded with more muscle then she remembered. Legs hanging off the end of the bed more then they should be after two weeks time. Long hair cut into a new short and spikey hair-style, complete with a tattoo on his left bicep.

While she had no doubt that this man-child was Jacob, this was definitely not her Jake. This appeared to be Sam Uley's Jacob. Her first impression was not a good one. Finding him like this made her even more pissed. Lucky for her, she knew exactly who to confront about this. In fact, Bella had a few choice words for La Push's resident gang leader.

She pushed past Billy once more-she knew it didn't take him that long to get to Jake's room in his wheelchair-he must have called someone, probably Charlie. Ignoring him, she walked past the window, only to catch sight of the man she was just thinking about.

Sam Uley, coming out the wood work in only a pair of cut-offs with his three stooges dutifully trailing close behind.

It seemed Billy actually did something right, he must have called Sam. She'd have to remember how pleased this made her, later on after he called Charlie to rat her out-gossiping old man.

The screen door slammed shut behind her with a loud bang that she paid no attention to. She didn't have to cross much of Billy's expansive back yard. They had the advantage of genetics on their side 3 large strides, to each of her own small ones. Needless to say, the over-grown gangsters were soon in front of her, and they were even bigger up close. She felt positively tiny, but didn't let it bug her.

"What did you do to him?!" she accused, eyes never leaving Sam Uley, who opened his mouth to reply before he was cut off.

One of the back up dancers stepped up to play. "We didn't do anything! What did he tell you?" Sam clone #1 yelled.

She dismissed him, keeping her eyes on the silent leader. She just knew if there were any vampires in a 10-mile radius they'd be able to hear her heart-beat with how furious she was.

The man growled at her, he fricken growled like a dog. How rude is that? She's trying to ignore him and he growls like a rabid animal. No manners at all, these gangsters. Finally turning to face the growler she shouted, "He doesn't tell me anything because he's scared of you!". She could feel how hot her cheeks were, even in this cold weather.

Then he laughed. This asshole had the audacity to laugh at her like something about this situation was even remotely funny, the nerve!

Next thing she knows, growler is all wide-eyed in shock. He had a small red mark on his cheek and her hand feels like she slapped a house. Conclusion, she just slapped this guy. Uh-oh. Shit that hurt, she has to fight back tears.

The guy starts shaking like he's having a seizure and she's starting to think that something about this situation is not right.

Then their eyes lock and she knows this is not normal at all, because she can't look away from his eyes. His eyes are so dark they almost look black and he has pretty eye-lashes. She drags her eyes away. He has an angular jaw, high cheek bones and cute ears. Can ears even be cute? Well his are, she wants to nibble them and this thought disturbs her. His neck is a smooth, inviting expanse of unmarked russet-flesh. Like the rest of Sam's gang, he's shirtless and Bella is left wondering how the hell she looped them all together because that chest, wow! It's magnificent, two little brown nipples set in a beautiful pair of pecs, an eight-pack-this guy is doing steroids-, a cute little inny belly button, with a little trail of hair leading into his shorts that had her biting her bottom lip. Her gaze continued downwards and she forgot all bout his chest because she noticed the inticing V of muscle that sadly disappeared into his cut-offs. She wanted to simultaneously trace it with her tongue and slap herself for thinking it. She fought a fierce blush, quickly scanning his muscular, jean-clad thighs, bare legs and feet before releasing her bottom lip and snapping her eyes back up to his.

She prayed he didn't notice she was checking him out and tried to remember what they were yelling about before he hypnotized her with his sexiness. God she wanted to pinch herself. She focused back on him, or at least where he used to be. Passionate charcoal eyes were replaced by intense golden with a slitted pupil and muscled russet skin replaced with silver furr. He turned into a horse-sized wolf and Bella had to fight the hysterical urge to pull her hair because the only thought she had about that was whether he would turn back so she could oogle him some more.

She was snapped out of her mid-life crisis-because what else could it be-by Jake yelling her name. She dumbly turned to him before being overcome with fear. Why was he running towards her? Did he not see the giant wolf behind her? He should run away-and so should she, with that thought her instincts finally kicked in and she sprinted towards him. A normal reaction, she was almost glad.

When she was about ten feet away from him she started to feel relief. She could grab him and they could run to Billy's house. She'd call Charlie, he'd come with his shotgun, shoot the wolf, and they'd all be safe.

She launched herself at him, but everything went horribly wrong because Jake was gone and there were scraps of what looked like jean, falling around her in a sick parody of snow. She heard a loud snarl as she fell to the ground. She hit the ground hard and rolled, finally able to see a second rust colored wolf land on the first. Then they rolled in a whirling mass, too fast for her to see, into the forest. So there she was, laying in the grass and wondering what the hell just happened.

Two shadows covered her and she slowly looked up to see the other two gangsters, one she absentmindedly recognized as Embry. The Embry gangster held a hand out to her and Bella could only stare at him confused.

The other guy laughed and Bella had to fight the urge to cry and call her dad.

"Bella. BELLA!" Embry yelled and she focused on him.

"I think we broke her" the other guy stated in an amused tone.

This made Bella turn her attention to him because she didn't like to be called broken. She certainly was not broken, Jake fixed her. Glaring at the unknown gangster, she ignored Embry's hand and shakily made her way to her feet. Without a word, she turned and started in the direction of her truck.

She was stopped in her tracks by a large, hot hand wrapping around her arm. "Hey Bella. Sam told us to bring you to Emily's" said Embry, looking at her worriedly.

Bella frowned. "Sam can go to hell" she answered without thinking.

The other guy guffawed, making Bella blush when she realized how rude she just was.

Embry grinned at her. "Well please come for me. I'm sure you want answers, right?" he asked, dropping his heavy arm around her shoulders, and steering her towards her truck.

Bella nodded and let him drag her to her truck. Embry took her keys and lifted her in, much to her annoyance. She unconcsiously slid to the middle of the bench seat, making room for Embry to climb in behind the wheel. The other guy hopped in the passenger side and continued to watch her expectantly. She frowned at him, what was she live entertainment?

"Bella this is Jared. We're taking you to Sam and Emily's house so they can explain everything" explained Embry helpfully once he noticed her gaze.

"Don't stare at Emily, Sam doesn't like it" stated the newly-dubbed Jared and Bella had to fight the urge to yell 'Don't stare at me because I don't like it either!'. She bit her tongue and nodded, deciding to ignore him.

That's how she found herself being introduced to Emily Young, Sam Uley's fiance. Emily hugged her, shoved her into a chair at the kitchen table, handed her a muffin and began her lecture on shapeshifters 101. Bella hoped she wouldn't be tested. After her traumatizing day she wasn't very confidant in her ability to recollect this stuff.

She drifted into her thoughts while Emily busied herself in the kitchen, making what aappeared to be a feast. The comfortable silence was interrupted by the sound of the front door closing. Bella watched Sam pass her, going to Emily and hugging her.

She watched as he sweetly kissed Emily's scarred face then her lips. She was equal parts happy for Emily and jealous. Sam hugged her like she was the only thing that mattered in the world. She looked away, lifting her oversized muffin and taking a small bite. The taste literally exploded on her tongue, yummy.

Her skin prickled with heat seconds before a muscular arm snatched a muffin from the plate in front of her. The huge muffin looked normal-sized in his hand and she had to double check to make sure hers wasn't just bigger. Her eyes stayed trained on his muscular back and she tilted her head slightly to check out his ass, deciding that the back view was just as good as the front.

He left just as quickly as he came, the screen door slamming shut behind him.

She furrowed her brow before taking another bite of her muffin and moving her eyes back to the other occupants of the kitchen. She jumped slightly when she met Sam's gaze head on and her cheeks colored slightly.

He smirked but didn't say anything.

After a question and answer session with Sam, Bella tiredly made her way home and dropped into bed exhausted.

Three weeks passed in a blurr between all the review at school for final exams, fixing her friendship with Jake, and spending time with her new friend Emily.

Much to Charlie's pleasure, she spent almost all her free time on the Rez.

Bella had gotten the chance to rethink her reaction to the mysterious silver wolf-boy. Emily told her his name was Paul Lahote and seemed to like asking Bella a multitude of questions about him, much to her embarassment.

Her reaction to him had been frightening and intense. He invoked emotions she had never felt before. After careful deliberation she just decided to write it off as lust. The guy was extremely good looking. He wasn't beautiful like Edward, but dangerously sexy. It had been over six months since Edward left her. Now that Jake fixed her, it's only natural that she started noticing other guys. Plus Edward and her hadn't gone farther then kissing despite her best attempts. Their whole relationship, atleast on her part was filled with sexual tension. Bella had been ready to burst before they broke up so it's only natural that her hormones were raging.

Feeling comfortable with her conclusion, life continued on with few changes. The first being her friendship with Emily, the second being her desire to be on the Rez all the time, and the third being her attraction to Paul Lahote.

Then things took an unexpected turn. Bella was awoken at night to knocking on her second-story bedroom window. She struggled to wake up, sitting up in and freezing in bed. Half of her wondered if she was just hearing things and the other half was frozen in fear.

Charlie was on night shift all weekend and wouldn't be home til' Bella got up in the morning.

She honestly doubted a human climbed up the tree by her window so her mind naturally went to vampires. She continued to listen, wondering why a vampire would knock on her window before eating her. Maybe they were polite? Maybe it was a Cullen, Esme made it a point to teach them manners. The only vamp to knock on her window was Edward and suprisingly, this thought did not invoke the warm fuzzy feelings it used to.

She looked over at her alarm clock. 2:47am. Seriously? It had to be a vampire, no human was that disrespectful of sleep. She waited another minute before deciding that she was hearing things. She prepared to lay back in bed before another louder knock broke the eerie silence of her room.

She clutched her blanket in fright before taking a deep breath. She slowly climbed out of bed, praying she wasn't making a mistake. When she recognized Paul she was instantly flooded with relief. She opened her window, wondering why he was there. Maybe there was a vampire or he was hurt.

She decided to ask him and when he didn't answer she checked his temperature only to immediately feel like an idiot after. Shapeshifters 101, higher temps right. His skin was hot. Like really hot, even hotter then Jake's. She must have said that out loud because he finally spoke with an "Of course I'm hotter then baby alpha. I'm a man, kitten".

She went through a cycle of confusion then embarassment. Oh god he thought she was hitting on him. Was he mistaking her worry as flirting? Was he flirting? He must really be sick. What other reason would he have to be flirting with mousey Bella Swan in her tree at 3am?

She decided to call Sam. He would fix this. She would explain herself, he would come and get Paul and Bella could go back to sleep. One problem, Paul didn't like that idea. He didn't like it at all, grabbing her wrist as she turned and sending a pleasure-filled shock up her arm. Wow, another thing to be added to her list of not normal. After more worried questioning about his health, on her part and more growls at her suggestion to call Sam he pulled her into his arms.

His hot skin made her have a full body shiver. That now familliar shock, more powerful and running through every place her skin met his. She absentmindedly wished her t-shirt was off so she could feel it everywhere.

"You don't need Sam. Don't say his name. All you need is me, you're mine" he stated, like that explained everything.

"I don't know what's going on Paul, but I'll stay with you okay? So let's call Sam please" she begged, not knowing what to do.

The hot skin of his nose brushed her neck, leaving goosebumps. She was really starting to get worried now. Everywhere he touched her thrummed with pleasure, it was all she could do not to melt into him. If she was Edward's heroine, this guy was definitely her ecstacy because he had her hot and bothered like no one's business.

She yelped loudly when his teeth nipped her neck, the pain shocking her.

"Don't beg for him. You have me, I'm not weak" he muttered, making her wonder what the hell he's talking about. Maybe he's gone crazy? She was starting to get a little scared.

"I won't hurt you" he promised. "You are mine Bella. You are to me what Emily is to Sam. You're my imprint, I can't stay away from you anymore" he added desperately.

Bella shivered at his words, her heart racing and her mind struggling to keep up. Emily and Sam? Imprint? Like baby ducks? "What does that mean?" she whispered, scared as hell.

"I love you" he said, his lips intimately painting the words against her neck and causing her to melt bonelessly against him.

She calmed down instinctively and pulled away, her eyes meeting his. "What do you need?" she asked calmly.

His answer was simple. "You". His lips met hers and nothing else mattered. Then she gave him what he wanted.

When Bella woke up she could tell it was much later then she usually got up on a Saturday morning. She bolted upright in bed when her memories from last night hit her. She slowly turned her head and let out a sigh of relief.

He was gone. She supposed she should feel bad about that but she really just felt glad. She needed time to process and he probably did to. She went to get out of bed and flushed at her nakedness. She winced when she stood up. It wasn't the worst pain she ever felt, but the intimacy of it made it memorable. She counted her blessings. It would have hurt much more had she not broke her hymen two years ago, when Renee went through her horse-back riding phase.

She put on her bath robe, gathered her bath stuff, and some clean pajamas for a lazy day inside.

She really couldn't believe it. Bella Swan just lost her virginity to Paul Lahote, La Push's bad boy. Not only that but she knew nothing about him. At this realization, the memories of last night washed over her. She caught a side-look at her red face in the mirror and had to laugh at herself.\

Despite her embarassment she could feel a tightening in her lower stomach. When he did that thing with his mouth and she-oh god, cold shower now!


End file.
